Funny Soup

Customer: Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter: Funny? But then why aren’t you laughing?

Doctor’s Assistant

A doctor wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant. “Seamus, I am going hunting tomorrow. I don’t want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of my patients.” “Yes, sir!” – answers Seamus. The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks: “So, Seamus, how was your day?” Seamus told him that he took care of three patients. “The first one had a headache so I gave him Tylenol.” “Bravo, and the second one?” – asks the doctor. “The second one had stomach burning and I gave him Malox, sir.” – says Seamus. “Bravo, bravo! You’re good at this and what about the third one?” – asks the doctor. “Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opened and a woman entered. Like a flame, she undressed herself, taking off everything including her bra, her panties and lied down on the table. She spread her legs and shouted: “HELP ME! For five years I have not seen any man!” “Thunderin’ Lard Jayzus, Seamus, what did ye do?” – asks the doctor. “I put drops in her eyes.” !!!!!

Doctor & The Woman

A woman runs into a doctor’s office and says “DOCTOR! DOCTOR! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts!”
The doctor replied, “Show me.” So the woman poked her ankle and screamed of pain. Then she poked her knee and yelled OW. She poked her forehead and screamed again. She was about to continue when the doctor said, “That’s enough, let me think this over.” He thought for about a minute and said “I think I know what your problem is. You broke your finger.”

انڈا اور ڈنڈا

funny jokes for kids
استاد (شاگرد سے) : انڈے اور ڈنڈے میں کیا فرق ہے؟ شاگرد: “کوئ فرق نہیں”۔ استاد: ” وہ کیسے”؟ شاگرد: ” دونوں ہی کھانے کی چیزیں ہیں”۔

The Contractor

short government jokes
Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Minnesota. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence.

آؤٹ آف سٹاک

funny lateefay
باپ نے چاۓ کیلۓشکر مانگی تو ماں نے کہا ” آؤٹ آف سٹاک” ہے۔ بچے نے آؤٹ آف سٹاک کا مطلب پوچھا تو باپ نے کہا:” کسی چیز کے نہ ہونے کو آؤٹ آف سٹاک کہتے ہیں”۔ ایک دفعہ اس کے باپ کے کچھ دوست ملنے آۓ تو باپ گھر پر نہیں تھا۔ بچے نے فوراً ان سے کہا ” ڈیڈی آؤٹ آف سٹاک ہیں”۔

خوبصورت بیوی

shadi jokes in urdu
نکاح کے بعد دولہا نے مولوی صاحب سے پوچھا ” آپ کی فِیس؟ مولوی صاحب: “بیوی کی خوبصورتی کے حساب سے دے دو” دولہا نے ایک سو روپے دے دیۓ، مولوی صاحب کو بڑا غصہ آیا لیکن چپ رہے۔ اچانک ہوا چلی اور دلہن کا گھونگھٹ اٹھ گیا۔ مولوی صاحب مسکرا کر بولے “یہ لو بقایا 80 روپے”۔

وکیل اورمعاوضہ

ایک نۓ وکیل کے ساتھیوں کو اعتراض تھا کہ وہ بہت کم معاوضہ لے کر اپنے پیشے کا وقار کم کر رہا ہے۔
وکیلوں کی ایک تنظیم نے اس سے جواب طلب کیا ۔ وکیل صاحب حاضر ہوۓ اور بتایا کہ انہوں نے کم معاوضہ لے کر وکالت کے پیشے کی عزت نہیں گھٹائ بلکہ غریب لوگوں کو بھی پائ پائ سے محروم کر دیا ہے!!

برش کی صفائ

ایک آدمی نے کپڑے پر بنی تصویر دیکھ کر اس کی تعریفیں کرنا شروع کر دیں “واہ کیا شاہکار ہے، ایک کپڑے پر ایسا زبردست آرٹ میں نے آج تک نہیں دیکھا۔ واہ کیا بات ہے۔ اتنے میں مصور اس کے پاس آ کر بولا: “جناب! یہ کوئ تصویر نہیں ہے بلکہ یہ تو میرے برش صاف کرنے کا کپڑا ہے!

بیوی کی خوشی

مدت سے بیکار شوہر نے آ کر بیوی کو خوشخبری سنائ “بہت اچھی ملازمت مل گئ ہے۔ مناسب تنخواہ ، مفت علاج، ٹنے جانے کو سواری اور باتنخواہ چھٹیاں۔” واقعی؟ یہ تو بہت اچھی ملازمت ہے”۔ بیوی نے خوشی سے کہا۔ “تو پھر تم تیار رہنا۔ کل کام پر جانا ہے۔” شوہر نے کہا!!

Funny Urdu Jokes is a fun sharing and laughter creator domain and seriously challenges the dominance of the non-laughter Fun.  There is no limited laugh quota specially when you read Funny Urdu Jokes.

Why  you should laugh?

  • The laugh will make you sleep better at night and work actively during the day light.
  • The laugh can make relationship a fresh.
  • These are merely words that create the whole drama and involuntarily bring smile on the faces.
  • The funny characters amuses the behaviors and help in translating the inner self without the need of a psychologist.

Funny Urdu Jokes Bring Some Change in Personality

Laughter can imbues a sense of friendship, attachment and affection. There may be different solutions available as an antidote of sadness and unhappiness but the real source of a great strength is only a laughter. The words are only meant for the delivery of comedic value and the resonance of the laughter lasts for the longer period.

Some Other Important Factors

The other important factor about laughter is taking good care of its health and life. The joke that produces a laughter must not be sacrificed due to misunderstanding or inability to add emotions that can trigger the tickling effect. As all the content that it shares comes from the real life, hence the understanding and penetration must be very simple and smooth.

Please don’t be Offend When you Make Fun

When you make fun please do not offend people. Anybody can tell Funny family jokes but it should make the people happy. A joke to a specific person may not be funny to others. It should not demean special behavior or relationship.

At you can develop doctors’ jokes, police jokes, sardar urdu jokes, jokes for students, teacher student jokes, shopkeeper jokes or love jokes to break tension and develop good humorous relationship.

The Shopkeeper jokes may bring laughter to many people but may not be healthy for the shopkeepers themselves. Sardar Jokes may make non sardars happy but it should applause the Sardars too. Urdu jokes on pathan may fascinate pathans as well. This art and principle is required for all Funny Urdu Jokes.