Lawyer Jokes

(Lawyer Jokes) Question: Is there any difference between a good lawyer and great lawyer?
Answer:  Yes. Good Lawyer knows the law very well. And a great lawyer knows the Judge!

Clever Jury Shocked the Lawyer

A noted criminal defense lawyer was making the closing argument for his client accused of murder, a case in which the body of the victim had never been found.
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Gift to a Judge

court jokes
A young lawyer, defending a businessman in a lawsuit, feared he was losing the case and asked his senior partner if he should send a box of cigars to the judge to curry favor. The senior partner was horrified. “The  judge is an honorable man,” he said, “If you do that, I guarantee you’ll lose the case!” Eventually, the judge ruled in the young lawyer’s favor. “Aren’t you glad you didn’t send those cigars?” the senior partner asked. “Oh, I did send them,” the younger lawyer replied. “I just enclosed my opponent’s business card with them.”
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$5000 for three questions

A man walks into a lawyer’s office. “I have a problem with my neighbor. But before we talk about that, I need to know: how much do you charge?” Says the lawyer, “well, I have a very simple fee structure.
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Newly Discovered Evidences

Lawyer: “Your Honor, I wish to appeal my client’s case on the basis of newly discovered evidence.”  
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A Strange Lawyer

A lawyer’s name was strange. When he died his friend asked the tombstone maker to write, “Here lies Strange, an honest person, and a lawyer. ” the tombstone maker warned that this statement can be very confusing, as anyone who passes by grave would think that three men were buried in a single grave. However, he suggested another statement, “Here lies a person who was not only honest but also a good lawyer. This way, whenever walked by his grave and read it, they will definitely say, “that’s strange!”
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Biology of lawyers

In a laboratory of biology, one scientist told the other, “Do you know we have replaced our subject from mice to a lawyer”
The other asked, “Why did you change?”
“well, there are many reasons but three are important. First there are plenty of lawyers, second, the lab boy does not get attached to them and lastly, there is the thing that mice would not do.”
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Son of a Lawyer !

( lawyer jokes )  The lawyer’s son inspired by his father wanted to become a lawyer too. So he went to graduate school and graduated in law with distinction. And then he went home to join his dad’s firm. At end of his first work day at the office, he entered his father’s office and excitedly said, “Dad, dad! On my first day at work, I have broken Mathew’s case that you’ve been working on for so many years.!” His dad shouted, “You Idiot! For ten years We’ve been living on the financing of that case.!”
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Lawyer and Honest Man

( best lawyer jokes ). A lady and her daughter were visiting the grave of the young lady’s grandma. On their way through the burial ground back to the car, the young lady asked, “Mummy, do they ever bury two people in one grave?” “Obviously not, dear,” answered the mother, “For what reason would you believe that?” “Back there on the tombstone it was written…’Rest in peace..a great lawyer and an honest man”
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